Saturday Night Joke
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Started by JP - Nov. 4, 2018, 9:41 a.m.

I've posted a couple of these here before; they have of late become a regular feature at a site I visit. I've tried to determine provenance via a web search, but the joke has previously appeared on multiple sites. Two things are for sure -- I didn't write it and it made me laugh.

Saturday Night Joke

A young biker family moved into a house next to a vacant lot. One day, a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot.

The young biker family’s 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers.

Eventually the construction crew, all of them “gems-in-the-rough” more or less, had adopted her as a kind of project mascot.

They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important. At the end of the first week, they even presented her with a pay envelope containing ten dollars.

The little girl took this home to her mother who suggested that she take her ten dollars “pay” she’d received to the bank the next day to start a savings account.

When the girl and her mom got to the bank, the teller was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own pay check at such a young age.

The little girl proudly replied: “I worked last week with a real construction crew building the new house next door to us.”

“Oh my goodness gracious,” said the teller, “and will you be working on the house again this week, too?”

The little girl replied, “I will if those assholes from Lowe’s ever deliver the damn drywall.”

Comments
By cfdr - Nov. 4, 2018, 10:01 a.m.
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Thanks for the laugh.

A joke is always most funny, it seems, when it cuts closest to the truth.


I have one that I always laugh about when I think about it.  (I don't think Elizabeth Warren reads marketforum, so I should be ok.)

One day a very young Indian boy came up to his father with a question.  He asked "Dad, how did I get my name?"

His Dad answered that it was just what came to mind at the time - like when his sister was born, they saw a deer running across the prairie, so she was named running deer.  Or, when his older brother was born they saw an eagle, and so he was named soaring eagle.

Then the Dad looked at the little boy and asked - "Why do you ask, two dogs f**king?" 

By JP - Nov. 4, 2018, 10:33 a.m.
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Yes -- I remember hearing and laughing at that joke many years ago; the version I heard had his dad looking outside the tent and naming the newborn child for the first thing he noticed.  I guess two dogs effing could take some consolation in that  the first thing his dad saw wasn't a dog puking.

By carlberky - Nov. 4, 2018, 2:15 p.m.
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A gal and a guy started dating and everthing seemed to be going well.

One day she started acting distant and cold towards him. He asked her if anything was wrong, and she
answered, "Yes, I'm afraid i'm going to have to break up with you. Frankly, you are just too uncoth !"  

He answered, "Don't I open the car door for you ? Don't I walk on the car side of the sidewalk ? Don't
 I take you to the nicest resturants ? So, what's this f*cking uncoth sh*t ?" 

By JP - Nov. 4, 2018, 7:36 p.m.
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Well, I have to hand it to him -- the guy makes a great point in just a few words!


By metmike - Nov. 4, 2018, 7:57 p.m.
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Funny stuff.......... thanks for the contribution.

I am starting up scholastic chess at 5 different schools where I volunteer as chess coach very soon for this upcoming season. 

There are around 200+ families that get my chess and weather emails from late November thru March. Also a large number of teachers, mostly elementary school. 

I was thinking of making some posts in the NTR forum that would provide and update the information for them and at the same time, help to pick up traffic here.

Though I am no prude and am grateful to have funny jokes that liven things up, I was thinking about a month from now, as chess coach, inviting parents of elementary school children to join our forum, what  the response would be.

Actually, most of the ones in junior high and high school would be coming here, not their parents and that would be even worse. 

If that happens, you will understand why our standards for posting have suddenly made foul language, even symbols that suggest foul language a no no. 

Does everybody want to be on their best behavior?

Actually, I may make an exception and put these posts in the trading section where better behavior is expected........then again, some of the expressive( and often hilarious) trading stuff from silver spiker is not what I want our kids/parents to see.


That may be the price that you'll  have to pay for me continuing as your moderator...if things worked out that way.  I will not take the chance of offending families or exposing young adults to something which sets a bad example. 


Hmmmm. Now that I think about it, there are way too many NTR posts that are ok here but not something that I should be promoting to this particular group and it would be stifling to sensor tons of stuff.......so forget the NTR section. 

What I may just do, is add to the trading section, an additional weather post, titled "Evansville Weather" and add a few chess posts up there too. 

Maybe its a bad idea what do you think?

Keep in mind that I want to remain active here and we also need to increase traffic from somewhere. 

 


By cfdr - Nov. 4, 2018, 9:38 p.m.
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However you want this forum is the way it will be - as far as I'm concerned.

You make the rules and I'll do my best to follow them.

By carlberky - Nov. 4, 2018, 9:48 p.m.
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"What I may just do, is add to the trading section, an additional weather post, titled "Evansville Weather" and add a few chess posts up there too."

sounds like a plan, Mike.